Top 10 ways to know if you're a fundamentalist Christian

1. You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.

2. You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

3. While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

4. You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

5. You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

6. You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

7. Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

8. You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

9. You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

10. You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

Adam and Eve

Incest is wrong. Many religious doctrines agree on this basic belief and have their own ways of demonstrating it and punishing it. Even scientists agree on this basic belief because it weakens the gene pool. We need a healthy blending of bloodlines to keep the human race strong and relatively disease free.

Therefor it's a religious, moral and scientific necessity to breed with those who we do NOT share a blood link.

With this in mind I'd like someone to explain this inconsistency because I just can't fathom how to join the dots. The Bible claims we are ALL descended from two people, Adam and Eve. That's EVERYONE on the planet alive since then until now and beyond. Let's lay this one out.

1. Adam and Eve had to both have survived to breeding age with no help from anyone (since they are the ONLY humans in existence) with predators all around. Maybe newborns back then were better hunters of rabbits than ours are today; maybe we've lost that skill with modern mollycoddling. For the sake of the story, we need them to survive.

2. Adam and Eve have to be in the same geographical area as each other at the same time. Don't underestimate this, look at the size of the planet and it's landmasses. Imagine saying to a friend "meet you in Brazil". For that, BOTH of you know what "Brazil" is, how to get there, know when and how to make the plans fit as they get closer, not forgetting the fact that you must have met in the first place to make the arrangements. Adam and Eve didn't have ANY of that and yet they got together (maybe they were natural travel agents).

3. Adam and Eve (the only two humans in existence) have to notice that they are different from each other, and have to figure out why they are different; the purpose of a penis and vagina.

4. They figure this out and decide to experiment (they have no-one to show them or explain to them....they are the only humans in existence remember; EVERYTHING is new to them) and Eve falls pregnant.

5. They have no idea what pregnancy is or what it means, just that Adam suddenly has double shifts on the hunter / gatherer duty as Eve is increasingly bloated and immobile.

6. Imagine the terror for both when she goes into labor (remember, these two are the only humans in existence at this point and have NO point of reference) but somehow Adam has the instincts of a natural midwife and knows what to do to ensure that both Eve and the baby survive.

7. They are now puzzled at how this little human appeared, but somehow get the idea that if they don't make more of these in their lifetime their species will die out (this assumes that they somehow know that they are the only versions of their species in existence...which in turn requires a traveling the planet on a massive scale doing surveys).

8. At least they know how it works, that is if they can remember what happened NINE MONTHS BEFORE and put "cause" and "effect" together to create "baby".

9. So, now they figured this out, they spend the next portion of their life increasing the family with Adam having to work even more shifts bringing back more and more food, and Eve becoming a natural in the "don't shove your sister into that fire!!" type of lines in building a new adult.

10. The first born is now of breeding age of her own, Adam and Eve know the process by now. They know that their daughter needs to have babies of her own to continue the line. They look around for who will be the father (remember this is the ONLY family in existence).

11. Will it be one of her brothers? Adam perhaps?

Incest is required either way to get this family past the second generation unless a new bloodline comes into it. If a new bloodline comes into it, then we are NOT all descended from Adam and Eve. With a new bloodline we have to assume they found their own path to reproductive enlightenment to get to where they are; which means that some of us may not be related to Adam and Eve but to this other bloodline.

If a new bloodline enters the story here, who is to say this is the ONLY other new bloodline alive at the time. If it is either one of her brothers or her father then the child will be genetically weakened with the morals not yet set in that it is "incest" and that it's "wrong".

With that pattern already established, when did we suddenly decide it was wrong? Why? It was responsible for us being here if the Adam and Eve story is true. All of this leaves out another unfathomable question.......where did Adam and Eve come from?

If they were the first humans; which they must have been if we're all descended from them, who are their parents? They can't be humans.....and if that's the case we're not humans. Did a genetic flip take place over one (well two if you count both Adam and Eve) birth? We have to be the result of some crossbreeding somewhere.

Maybe it's science which is wrong here, it's shown in many ways that inbreeding weakens the child and opens them to many diseases and illnesses, yet we're all a result of inbreeding and after 1,000's of generations of inbreeding the human race has managed to invent technology to do all sorts of things, to explore the planet around us in intricate ways and get inside the human mind to understand the thought process itself, so that can't be true.

Either that or we have a VERY sophisticated and resourceful couple with NO EDUCATION or previous experience (this is a couple who have to figure EVERYTHING out on their own remember) who managed to fit in all that traveling and breeding after understanding on a much deeper level than many today what is needed. They seem to be naturals in some very important and diverse skill sets.

How long would it take to travel the world on foot, making sure to visit every place people could live? They have no maps to plan their route as that'd require someone from a different bloodline to have traveled and made the maps. They'd also need ship building skills capable of crossing the seas to check out foreign lands, as well as navigation skills to be able to get there.....with this in mind they must have known the world was not flat, yet that belief held sway for centuries. Why?

It'd need to be on every landmass, and all started AFTER the realization that they may be the only humans in existence.....all to prove a theory and do the responsible thing for the species. If this is the case, we ARE an intelligent lot aren't we?